With new variants of COVID-19 sweeping the globe at alarming rates, it would be more than reasonable for you to want to postpone any sexy plans you may have had that would involve travel, whether across the city or across the world.
But a wonderful thing about kink, as opposed to vanilla sex, is that so much of it is psychological and verbal, so in many cases you can use the phone, Skype, Zoom, or another real-time digital medium to pick up where you left off in-person. Here are 5 kinks that have the capacity to be just as hot over the phone as they are when you're physically together with your partner(s). Schedule a digital sex-date with your sweetie and see where it takes you!
1. Dominance & submission
Many people's kinks are centered around some form of power exchange: the practice wherein one partner consensually gives authority to another, whether 24/7 or just for the duration of one hot kink session.
Dominance and submission can be signalled through cues like titles and honorifics, tone of voice, and body language, all of which can translate to digital communication methods. Try, for example, telling your partner exactly how you want them to touch themselves for you, or requesting moment-by-moment instructions while you give a striptease on camera.
2. Humiliation play
Some kinky people like to be gently (or harshly) mocked during sex, for things like how turned on they are or how desperate they are for release. Experienced humiliation kinksters sometimes delve into darker territory, like mockery of a person's appearance, genitals, or sexual virility. Since humiliation is usually verbal, it works well in an online medium.
Always pre-negotiate humiliation scenes, since they can be pretty emotionally heavy – and leave ample time for aftercare!
3. Voyeurism & exhibitionism
If you've got a webcam, or your phone has a camera, you can easily use it to orchestrate a "show" for a voyeuristic partner to enjoy. For example, you could strip for them, masturbate in front of them, or just show them parts of your body that you know get them going.
To take things even further, you could try pretending that one of you doesn't know their camera is on, which infuses the thrilling taboo of a "peeping tom" scenario into your play.
Another route you could take is to use smartphone-controlled sex toys, which connect via Bluetooth to your phone so you can give control of the vibrations to your long-distance partner. It can be tons of fun, for example, to watch your sweetheart squirm while you send a barrage of vibration patterns their way, or to deny them vibration until they complete a certain task for you. (Don't forget the lube!)
4. Erotic hypnosis
Since hypnosis is usually a process involving one person speaking while the other person listens, it can easily be done over the phone, or any other medium with an audio element. Erotic hypnosis is exactly what it sounds like: using the art of hypnotism for erotic purposes, such as planting temporary suggestions in a person's mind during trance that enhance their sexual sensitivity, alter their headspace, or create pleasure in unusual areas of the body.
Check out the book Mind Play by Mark Wiseman to learn the basics of erotic hypnosis – and make sure everything you do is explicitly pre-negotiated, since trance is an altered state that affects decision-making, much like being drunk or high.
5. Psychological bondage
Doing bondage by yourself isn't safe, because of the risks of getting stuck or cutting off circulation, among other things. You wouldn't want to find yourself unable to escape from your wrist cuffs, especially if you live alone and couldn't immediately call anyone for help.
But if you fetishize bondage and the constriction and control it provides, you could experiment with psychological bondage, the practice of restraining someone using only the power of their own mind. You could tell your partner they'll only earn an orgasm if they stay perfectly still while a vibrator is strapped to them, for example, or make them get into a position that shows off your favorite part of their body and hold it until you decide they can relax. Have some fun getting creative with "bondage" from a distance!
What kinks do you like playing with over the phone/Skype/Zoom/etc.?